Boiling Rage

I live about thirty minutes drive away from Derbyshire and, when I get chance, I like to visit the county's amazing show caves. I must have been twenty times over the years and on every single occasion I've thought of 'Trog'.

'Trog' is a fantastically entertaining film. When the missing link is discovered in a cave, anthropologist Dr. Beckton (Joan Crawford, in her last role) trains it to play with dolls, balls and, eventually, with the aid of an operation, to form simple words. Trog is at heart a beast, however, and every little thing that bothers him ends up smashed, chucked or dead. When he escapes (with the aid of shit stirring Christian nut job Michael Gough) it can only end one way: he's going out like Konga, in a hail of army bullets.

I unashamedly love this film. There are too many high points to provide a definitive list, but the long sodium pentathol sequence, where a whacked out Trog has a dubious flashback in which he watches dinosaurs fight, become extinct and the coming of the Ice Age (events a mere sixty odd million years apart) truly has to be seen to be believed.

Director? Freddie Francis: the patron saint of this weblog.

Trog

Black Magic Explodes

'Craze' is an intriguing tale of an antiques dealer who falls under the spell of an ancient African idol and starts sacrificing women to it.

It stars Jack Palance, who pulls out all the stops, affecting an effective British accent and wielding an axe like a maniac. Occasionally quite violent, it goes off track in the middle for a bit but pulls itself back together for a great climax. Another good cast, too: Palance, Diana Dors, Michael Jayston, Suzy Kendall (although wasted in a nothing role), Trevor Howard and Percy Herbert.

Good stuff which in any fair and equitable world would be a staple of late night telly but, of course, isn't. You can get it on a German DVD, though, and you probably should, especially as it's a dual audio edition. 

Craze

Mighty Fury

'Konga' is a deeply ridiculous, terribly endearing film. Mad Scientist Michael Gough (who else?) reappears after a year in the jungle with a chimp and a handful of mystical herbs that can transform his pet into a massive gorilla (I can just about accept the increase in size, but a change in species?). Gough being Gough, he immediately sets the mutated primate on the trail of his enemies, and murder is the inevitable result.

Naturally (or unnaturally) it all goes wrong and, before you can say 'King Kong', Konga grows gargantuan and decides to trash London.

For once Wikkipedia describes the end best, with the poignant 'upon his death, he reverts back to a chimpanzee'. I love this film so much it's pitiful.

Konga

Puts You In The Picture

'Horrors Of The Black Museum' caused a furore on its release in 1959, shocking audiences and outraging public standards with its cocktail of garish colour, sadistic violence, sexual deviance and cha cha dancing. Hypnovision is a meaningless term: like several of the things on this poster, it doesn't actually appear on screen. Michael Gough doesn't so much chew the scenery in this as slather the whole set in ketchup and wolf the lot. Recommended!

Horrors of the Black Museum