Saturday, 23 March 2013

Above And Below The Sea

When I first saw the trailer for 'Warlords Of Atlantis', I remember thinking 'well, that looks like the greatest film of all time'. It's not quite that good, but it is energetic, fast moving and action packed, especially as, every fifteen minutes or so, there's a rubber monster attack.

Sucking his belly in, in Doug McClure stars as a Victorian engineer who is unknowingly on a trip to discover Atlantis. After being lost since the dawn of time, you'd think that finding the sunken city would be a tall order but, nope, within about ten minutes Doug, scientist / archaeologist Peter Gilmore and the rest of the raggle taggle scum  bag crew have been plucked from their boat by an enormous octopus and dragged down to a land beneath the sea where giant, angry mutated animals roam the land and all the men have weirdo avant garde pie dish fringes. It's a funny place, especially when the Atlanteans reveal that they came from Mars and, finding the people of Earth 'retarded' (cheers) have been pulling the strings for our species since pre-history.

Their next goal as 'the master race' is progressing to a world of pure science - and total obedience - and, to illustrate what it might be like, they mind project pictures of Hitler addressing a Nazi rally. Having taken some time and trouble to get there, our intrepid adventurers now can't wait to get the hell away, especially as, if they stay much longer, they will be fitted with gills and forced to join the Atlanteans enormous slave army. Cue gunplay, high dives and a load of plastic fish that leap out of the water to rather ineffectually nip at parts of their fleeing bodies.

A great mix of cheapo action, high camp and Boys Own, 'Warlords' may not actually be the greatest film of all time, but it's a good laugh and utterly unpretentious, and the rubber monsters are fantastically rubbery.

Here's that trailer. It's not exactly how I remember it!


  1. The trailer may no longer promise the greatest film of all time, but the poster is fucking amazing.

    A Christmas holiday standard of times gone by... How the yoot of today would snort.

  2. aye, not quite up there with 'island at the top of the world', which is the 'greatest film ever made' (donald sinden and flying rubber killer whales = unsurpassable) but it does look a fine piece (rather like doug's 'do' - which isn't, but should be...)
    perhaps a mention for the remarkably intense michael gothard (even with his 'do'!)? 'Looked him up' the other day, and was sad to read of his sorry end.